I am not by any means normally a morning person. So when I decided to drag myself out of bed on a Saturday morning after being out late the night before so I could watch the sunrise on the first day of the year, I was hoping for something - well, a little more exciting than what I got. In my mind, it would be a brilliant sky of vibrant pinks and oranges and purples, the sun bursting forth over the lake, a glorious golden ball, a promise that the new year would be full of light and excitement. What I got was a biting cold wind and a sky full of so many clouds, you couldn't really see the sun at all. While the pastel pinks, greys, and blues were pretty, they were also much softer than the vision in my head. There was no single moment where the sun burst over the horizon; rather, the sky simply gradually got lighter. The wind was so cold that I couldn't bear to stand outside with the camera for more than a few moments, so I bounced in and out of the car, wanting to take as many pictures as I could, a little disappointed in what there was to take pictures of, and cold enough to start wondering why I had dragged my tail out of bed for this in the first place. I ended up with a grand total of 4 photos. On the one hand, I feel this is rather underwhelming for having achieved the momentous task of getting myself out the door at 7am on a Saturday morning. On the other hand, there is not a great deal of difference in any of them. Perhaps if I'd gotten up slightly earlier and gotten a few pre-dawn shots. Or if I'd braved the cold for a little longer than 10 minutes. Oh well. I guess these 4 aren't so bad.
So why did I get up for the sunrise anyway? Well, as I've mentioned before, I've been digging a lot into the Energy Profiling system by Carol Tuttle. I originally thought I was a Type 2, but after some unexpected comments and a lot (I mean a LOT) of thought, I now believe I am a Type 1 with a secondary 2. Type 1 is described as the Bright Animated woman, and the sun/moon cycle associated with Type 1 is sunrise - so while it is NOT something I plan on making a habit out of, I thought it would be a cool way to greet the new year. Type 2 is described as the Subtle Soft woman. So... I was envisioning a Type 1 sunrise - what I got was more Type 2.
You know what though? I decided that was ok. Actually, I consider it a good picture for myself. I am excited about learning more about the Energy Profiling system and am striving to use it to gain more insights about myself and others, and most importantly to start to really live my truth (a key idea in the system). See, even though 2 is my secondary type, I have been living in my 2ness for more years than I can even think of. As I learn more about Type 1 and allow myself to let those aspects come out, even learn to embrace them, I am finding that I feel more relaxed, more free, and more excited - more Bright and Animated! - and I'm loving it! At the same time, that doesn't mean the Soft and Subtle 2 is gone. It's still there, influencing my 1ness and how it is expressed, and I'm figuring out all those nuances too. So to me, this sunrise is a beautiful picture of my life, right now and what I look forward to in the year ahead. Maybe the sun didn't burst forth in one glorious moment, and maybe I won't have any brilliant flashes of instant inspiration where I suddenly totally understand myself, know how to fully live my truth, and all my problems are over (don't I wish!) - but that's ok. Maybe my walk looks more like a serious of small discoveries, knowing myself better and better gradually over time, changing old ideas and learning to live my truth a little more each day. It's still a beautiful expression of 1 and 2 together, each new day gradually awakening to more truth. That's my own unique style, and it's beautiful.
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